In a lengthy Facebook post titled, THE NKST ‘LAW’ ON BRIDAL TRAIN: BETWEEN THE HYSTERICS AND THE DEMAGOGUES, lawyer and leading member of the church, Terhemen Oscar Aorabe, defended the move, adding that the church made the resolution to bind her members. Read below:
"During the 2016 November General Synod of the NKST Church, the Synod resolved that henceforth, only members of the Church would be allowed to be on the bridal train in weddings conducted by the Church. Since then a bedlam was let loose on the social media, particularly on Facebook, where, for over two weeks I watched with amusement as the hysterics and the demagogues tore at each others’ throats.Surprisingly, none of the Clergy in the NKST Church who took part in the Synod came out to attempt to defend and explain the decision. The only rational voice that defended the decision was strangely the Voice of Rev. Father Solomon Ukeyima, a catholic Priest.
Incidentally, some members of the Church joined in on the side of the hysterics and consistently baited me to throw my hat in the ring, erroneously thinking, presumably from my previous complaint against the Synod for taking decisions on Peace House, that I would lend my voice to the hysteria.
Now, before I am accused, as my Friend Daniel Tseuve would, of using big English, let me define the two contending parties so that my reader can comprehend my point from the onset:
Hysterics means an expression of extreme phobia (fear), excitement or anger that makes somebody lose control of their emotions and cry, laugh or curse. The state is known as hysteria. People who are under hysteria are also called ‘hysterics’.
A demagogue, on the other hand, appeals to people's emotions, instincts, and prejudices, in a way that is considered to be politically or religiously manipulative and dangerous.
Now, neither the demagogic rabble rousers or blind supporters nor the Hysterics were justified in their “I Stand with NKST” or “Proudly NKST” or threats to leave the church en masse, without trying to explain or understand the rationale behind the decision. The NKST Church was definitely right as Rev. Father Solomon Ukeyima explained.
But before I attempt at explaining the policy behind the resolution, let me digress a little and state that before the resolution that only members of the Church would be allowed on the bridal train, there was the resolution stripping parents of their right to give out their daughters in marriage in the Church ceremony. The parents were required to hand over the bride to the appointed elder during the bride-price paying ceremony which elder would in turn hand the bride to the groom during the church ceremony. Many of the hysterics outside the Church did not hear of that one because they were not involved. But those within the Church kicked and are still kicking. That resolution was intended to cure a mischief that was being perpetrated by some Mothers in law.
An incident happened in NKST Makurdi Central where, the in-laws refused to come down from the Bus that brought them to the Church unless they were paid an outrageous sum of money they demanded before they could come and hand over the bride thereby holding the whole ceremony and people to ransom. The Resident pastor after waiting for more than one hour to no avail, ordered that since the bride price had already been paid and the bride was already in the Church, the wedding should proceed. The wedding proceeded. When the in-laws learnt that they had been bypassed and rendered irrelevant, they scampered down the Bus only to witness their daughter weeping profusely during the ceremony. When such ‘hostage takings’ became rampant across the consistories, the matter was taken to the NKST Synod which resolved to exclude parents from handing over their daughters.
It must be conceded by both the Hysterics and the demagogues that every Church denomination reserves the right to control the conduct and behavior of its adherents and situations arise from time to time when the need to come down on corrosive behavior that is creeping into the Church arises. It must also be noted that in religion, you don’t conduct a plebiscite or a referendum among members to take an important decision on spiritual matters like the Hysterics are advocating by their conduct. That will amount to handing over power to the mob. The authority in the Church is vested at different levels from the Local Church Committee to the Synod. Therefore, when the highest body, widely represented by delegates, takes a decision, it becomes binding until it is reversed by the same body. That is why when both the Catholic Church and the NKST in the year 2006 took a decision to prohibit the building of expensive graves for their deceased members; both the rich and the poor had to fall in line.
Now, what is different with the new resolution that caused so much mass hysteria among the outsiders, leading to a response in kind by the demagogues? The answer is not far-fetched; it is because the only door through which the hysteric rabble could crash into the solemnity of the Church activities and exhibit their glamourous indecency has been slammed shut in their faces. They knew that they could not breeze into the Church and partake in the Holy Communion or get baptized; the only two ceremonies the NKST regard as sacraments! But hitherto courtesy of their friends and their friends weddings, they could creep into the Church with their creepy behaviours and brazenly exhibit their licentious conducts until their indecency grew into outrageous proportions and needed be controlled.
The NKST Constitution gives the pastors and elders of Consistory (Parish) immediate control over their communicant members. They have little influence over Communicant members of other consistories and none over non- NKST members. So when you discover that the person you have authority over is bringing in persons over whom you have not control, you go for the person over whom you have control and cure the mischief. That is exactly what NKST Did. The NKST Consistories can discipline their Communicant members directly for violation of its regulations. They can also report other communicant members to their respective consistories for investigation and possible sanction. The same control cannot be extended to other persons who do not belong to the NKST fold.
I had the responsibility of coordinating every Church wedding in one of the biggest NKST Congregations during my tenure as an elder and Church Secretary and I can testify that the resolution has been long overdue. I had a hectic time in NKST Makurdi Central with a herculean task trying to enforce decency during weddings. I had to devise a way of minimizing the effect of weird and indecent dressing by insisting that the Groomsmen were seated in the front row and the bridesmaids behind them in the second row. Imagine yourself sitting in front of the Church facing the entire congregation as an elder or pastor of a Church, and just sitting in front of you are several half clad young ladies with their breasts popping out of their low necklines at the same time provocatively opening and closing their short-skirted legs occasionally and capriciously, exposing their thighs and undergarments to your extreme unease and embarrassment. You have two extreme but equally embarrassing choices; one is to look on a pretend as if nothing is happening and become guilty of enjoying the obscenity (with an occasional ‘misfitting’ of your trouser) or avoid looking in that direction, which is only possible by turning your back to the congregation, a punishment no respectable man can bear for long in a congregation.
These are ways in which Satan encroaches on the territory of the Church to bring abomination that causes destruction to the holy place, where it does not belong. These children of Belial are not contented with exposing their nudity and shame at campuses, carnivals and beauty pageants; they must desecrate the Church also, and wedding ceremonies give them an avenue to penetrate the sanctity of the Holy place. This had to be stopped! The law may not stop it but at least the Synod has done its part. The enforcement is left with the consistories.
I hear of threats that there will be mass exodus from the NKST Church as a result of this resolution. So be it! It will be good riddance to bad rubbish. No Church worth its salt will open its doors wide to the rebellious rabble to come in and dictate to it on spiritual matters. By the way, ‘for many are called but few chosen.’ There are always other Churches, like the Church of Mormon and the Church of Satan, whose doors are wide open to receive the children of perdition. I hear again that there are churches that ask their members to come to the Church naked like Adam and Eve, if these renegade youth cannot find such churches in Nigeria to join, perhaps they can start their own.
For all that I know, NKST made the resolution to bind only her members. If you are affected by the resolution by exclusion, it is as natural, just as you cannot partake in the Communion of the Church without going through the indoctrination process and getting baptized"
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